An Open Letter To My Brother

Dear Tom,

It’s been a while since we last spoke. It’s hard to believe you’ve been gone for ten months now, I’m pretty sure I’ve thought about you in some small way every day since.

It’s been a crazy year. We finally finished that EP we worked on, people seem to really dig it. Loads of people say the drums on there are incredible and I can only agree. Ant has taken over and given your parts the care and love to preserve them forever, I think you’d be really proud of how it all sounds.

We played a show in memory of you - you’d have cracked up at the thought of me doing a speech. I was probably super out of key at points, I’m sure you would’ve told me. Your family came too, they were incredible - it’s easy to see where you got your personality from. It was in the paper and everything, you’d have loved being the centre of attention for a night.

James and Alex got married last week, I wish you could’ve seen it. Our boy scrubbed up alright, and Alex looked beautiful. The band were great, you’d have probably got on the kit yourself! James’ stag was great, we raised a glass to you and shared a moment. You know it kills James to be soppy but we were all choked up.

I’m going to be a Dad, which is as wonderful as it is slightly terrifying. I’m in the new flat now, which should be perfect for the little family. I’ll tell my baby about their Uncle Tom who was a bloody madman but we loved him. In fact, if it’s a boy, we’re gonna give the middle name “Thomas” in memory of you.

Ten months on and I miss you so much I’m crying against just writing this out. I know you’d be laughing at me if you were here, never one for sentiment. I hope you’d be proud of how we’re trying to keep things together, and I’ll always regret that the last time we spoke wasn’t a conversation I’m proud of. In that way, I guess you’ve made me a better man without even realising it.

Sleep well brother,